Silence

Who would have thought silence can be deafening. When this happens I am a wreck. The anxiety of not knowing what is going on and the anticipation of something that may not be what I expected are crushing me. The power that it has over me drives me to the edge no matter how I try to ignore it; telling myself that everything will turn out OK, keeping myself busy with other things to keep my mind of the dilemma and pushing away the thoughts that things could turn for the worst.
I hope those who have used silence to resolve matters realize that more damage than good is done. Silence is a dangerous space for doubts, negativity and suspicion to grow. There is no telling, will the dark thoughts go once the silence is over. Been there and often it hurts really bad.
I pray that the dark glimpses of possibilities that are pushing through the back of my mind will go away as I strive to recollect every sense of hope and joy to tread the silence I am facing.